Thursday, August 02, 2007

How Will I Tell Him?


A couple of weeks ago, I was waiting to check out at Jewel's, and I made my usual scan of the tabloids, looking to see if the Weekly World News had a particularly good headline. I didn't see the headline, or a Weekly World News, for that matter.

And then last week, my world caved in on me. I discovered, while reading Samurai Frog's blog that the Weekly World News has ceased to exist. This was confirmed by Evil Genius.

The Weekly World News and I go back a long time. When I was in college in the early and mid eighties, I roomed with three of my best buddies. One of us would ultimately buy the News every week, and some of the particularly absurd headlines and articles would end up taped to the walls of our apartment. Once in a while, the household activities would stop as one of us read one of uberconservative parodist "Ed Anger's" columns to everybody.

After college, I continued over the years to pick up the Weekly World News once in a while. When I was rooming with my good friend The Elk and our late friend Mark in Wrigleyville in the eighties, I got The Elk a subscription to the Weekly World News as a gag (yes, it was me, Elk!).

A couple of years ago, my son Adam took a shine to the newspaper, probably partly because of their frequent stories about his hometown, Chicago. Somehow, the Sun-Times and the Chicago Tribune, both of which he subscribes to, missed the breaking stories on sea monsters and UFO's in Lake Michigan.

So this weekend, I will have to break the sad news-- that the greatest, cheesiest tabloid ever, the Weekly World News has gone to that big newsroom in the sky. I'll have to do something to ease his pain. Maybe I'll pick up a National Enquirer for him on the way home from work today.

12 comments:

Natalie said...

I think it still exists online. Maybe that will provide some solace.

GETkristiLOVE said...

Poor Adam. Yes, I think either National Enquirer or Fox News should do the trick.

Skylers Dad said...

Some of the greatest stuff comes from across the pond in the UK. Do a google search on English papers and have a ball!

deadspot said...

Say it aint so, Johnny... say it aint so.

Erik Donald France said...

But Bat Boy Lives!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We'll see -- could be another clever PR ploy . . . . .

'Bubbles' said...

I always imagine what it might be like on the edit staff - in a meeting. I mean, do they laugh their butts off at their own stuff?

Back when I wrote Corporate spin sometimes my colleages and I would sit in a late night meeting and draft the spin the way we would say it to each other - with snarks and sarcasm and uh, the whole truth. We would laugh, and laugh, and laugh. Then we hauled out the hip boots and started spinning the actual communique.

Surely the editors of these papers have even more fun - they actually get to publish the funny stuff!!

The Elk said...

Point to Ponder:
Ever Noticed that you haven't seen Bat Boy and GW Bush in the same place at the same time?
Could they be one and the same?

Beth said...

I still have that Bat Child issue in my magazine basket. Never will I throw it away.

BeckEye said...

Bat Boy will live forever on the internetz. And in my heart.

Anonymous said...

For this tragedy, do I get a raise in allowance?
hint:I'm the "highly observent" one

Big Orange said...

breaks my heart, goddamnit. Why?? how could this world allow something like this to happen?? WHHHYYY???

Johnny Yen said...

Natalie-
I'll have to look for that! Thanks!

Kristi-
He saw the documentary "Outfoxed." He's hep to Fox News' perfidy.

Skyler's Dad-
Yeah, he's 13-- probably ready for the "Page 3 girls."

Deadspot-
Yeah, it's been a succession of disappointments-- National Lampoon, Spy Magazine and now the Weekly World News.

Erik-
Bat boy was the best-- that and the alien who was friends with Bush, Clinton, etc.!

Bubbles-
I can't remember the specifics, but a few years ago, some employees at a small newspaper sent added some gag stories into a paper that insulted a bunch of people. It inadvertently ended up in the real paper and got them in some hot water.

Elk-
No, couldn't be-- Bat Boy is much smarter. Not that that is hard to do.

Beth-
Adam came across an old copy of the News in his room, and plans on keeping it.

Beckeye-
Bat Boy lives!

Adam, er, I mean Anonymous..
Allowance? What allowance?

Big Orange-
It's a harsh world, isn't it?