Okay, a couple of months ago, I blogged about Cynthia Plastercaster, the legendary rock groupie. The gist of it was that my friend Graham Elvis, who was my drinking buddy back in my long-gone barfly days at the Gingerman Tavern, asked her, at a benefit, who the most well-endowed rock star she and the Plastercasters had, um, serviced was. I'll let you read the old entry if you want to find out. It'll bend your sense of reality.
Graham was an interesting guy. His band had developed a huge following at the University of Illinois at Champaign-Urbana. A high point was when they'd opened for the Clash in 1983. When his fan base began to graduate and move, largely, back to Chicago, the Elvis Brothers moved there with them, and made a good living playing as almost a nostalgia band for those grads.
The Elvis Brothers never grew beyond being a regional favorite, something Graham would be the first to tell you. Yet, being even a regional rock star is enough to get a guy laid. Graham told me stories of craziness. Girls after every show. Threesomes. Girls of every stripe, color and ethnicity. One time, a girl wanted him to deflower her younger sister, which he did, as the older sister and a friend peeked in to the bedroom giggling.
Graham had, to my surprise, children from some of these liasons. Several of them. He would find out about them sometimes years later, when he'd be back in the town he'd had a tryst in. The girl would show up after the show and tell him about it. Maybe even show him a picture. They never wanted his participation, never wanted child support. Weird.
In trying to track my old buddy down, I came across this. It's a from a blog run by a guy who is, tongue firmly in cheek, celebrating the great Champaign-Urbana rock scene that has turned out bands like REO Shitwagon, er, I mean Speedwagon, and a New Wave band, Combo Audio, that actually had a hit, Romanticide (apparently they are having a reunion, like so many other bands of that era.)
According to this blog, they're having a reunion of all the illegitemate kids sired by Elvis Brothers members. I'd assume that Graham contributed to this group.
With what I know about Graham, I can't figure out if this is a joke or not.